I used to think it was cute when a man would tell me, “You remind me of my mother.” Now I know better than to date any man who has these sentiments about me. Ladies, don’t date a man who says you remind him of his mother because every issue that he has unresolved with her, he will take out on you.
T R U S T me.
After dating a few men I determined had “mommy issues,” I realized that their attraction to me rested on their equation of certain qualities I hold as a woman, to the positive qualities within the woman they hold in the most high regard, which is their mother. However, as time went on, I realized that those same qualities triggered those issues within them that would make them lash out and exhibit childish behavior that secured my unattraction.
If he carries resentment about control his mother exerted over him that prevented him from doing whatever he wanted to do, he will purposely do things in your relationship to test your boundaries.
If he carries resentment about the different men that his mother rotated in her love life, he will respect you on one hand, but on the other will be insecure about you cheating on him, or will constantly diss you low-key by insinuating that you’re a hoe.
If you happen to have children with a man who holds resentment against his mother for the absence of his father in his life, he will be the kind of father that looks good on paper, AKA “The Weekend Daddy.” While he may take on an active role in his child/children’s life, he only does enough so that he cannot be called a deadbeat. He is moved by the desire to be better to his children than his dad was to him, but because his father was not around, he struggles with understanding the difference between being present and actually raising a child.
Keep in mind that this note is based on my personal experience. My experience is based around dating men raised primarily by single mothers. Oddly enough, I have yet to date a man who was raised with both his mother and father in the home.